From Vision to ‘I Do’: Inclusive Destination Wedding Planning in Heidelberg, Germany

Why Heidelberg? Our Inclusive Destination Wedding Planning Began...

Our love story started with travel—so it only felt right to begin our married life with an adventure. But for us, Heidelberg, Germany, was more than just a dreamy destination—it was deeply personal and rooted in our shared German heritage.

Amalia was actually born in Heidelberg and has family roots woven throughout the city. Fun fact: her dad, Gideon, was a savvy businessman who created "Mandy's Diner" in Heidelberg, which has since been transformed into a railway diner inspired by classic American fare (and is still part of the family business today!).

Jenna also has a special connection to Germany: her grandparents were married in Frankfurt, adding another layer of meaning and nostalgia to our wedding journey. With both of us sharing German heritage, getting married in Heidelberg felt like a beautiful way to honor our families and our story.

Heidelberg itself is a warm, friendly, and welcoming city—especially for LGBTQ+ couples. The city is filled with historical romance, from its breathtaking castle perched above the Neckar River to its winding cobblestone streets. Local dining and charming shops make it the perfect small city for guests to explore and truly experience while celebrating with us. It was everything we could have wished for: inclusive, magical, and full of opportunities for our loved ones to create their own memories alongside ours.

Step One: Planning from Across the Ocean

Once we’d set our hearts on Heidelberg, reality set in: inclusive destination wedding planning from another country is a wild adventure all on its own! We dove headfirst into spreadsheets, timelines, and late-night Google searches, determined to make it work—just the two of us (and a lot of coffee & emotional support snuggles with Nutella, our goldendoodle).

• Budgeting: We mapped out a realistic budget, accounting for flights, accommodations, the venue, and the “must-haves” that would make the day feel like ours. We also factored in a little wiggle room for unexpected costs—because if there’s one thing we learned, it’s that surprises always pop up!

• Guest List: Our guest count leveled out to about 80, with a little over half making the journey from the USA. We felt so grateful and honored to have so many loved ones willing to travel across the world to celebrate with us!

• Venue Search: With so many guests coming from out of town, on-site accommodations were a top priority. We wanted everyone to feel comfortable, relaxed, and able to fully enjoy the experience without the stress of extra travel. This became a major factor in our venue hunt and shaped so much of our planning.

• Research: We became pros at scouring wedding blogs, vendor directories, and even local Heidelberg forums. Google Translate was our constant companion, helping us communicate with vendors and navigate contracts in German.

• Logistics: From legal paperwork to travel arrangements, we tackled each challenge step by step. There were definitely moments when it felt overwhelming, but breaking everything down into manageable tasks (and celebrating each small win) kept us moving forward.

  
  

Pro tip: If you’re planning a destination wedding, start early and stay organized! We used Trello boards and Google Drive folders to keep everything on track—tools we still use today for our clients.

Finding “The One”: Our Venue & Vendor Dream Team

When it came to choosing a venue, we knew it had to be just right—not only beautiful and functional, but also a place that felt like “us.” After lots of research and more than a few video tours, we came across Hoher Darsberg…and instantly fell in love. Ever get that gut feeling that something is just made for you? Meant to be? Fate? Whatever you want to call it, we felt it for Hoher Darsberg. The moment we saw the stunning grounds, the elegant spaces for both ceremony and celebration, and the cozy on-site accommodations, we just knew: this was the place where our story would unfold.

Having so many guests traveling from the USA made on-site accommodations a huge priority for us. Hoher Darsberg not only checked every box on our list, but it also offered that warm, welcoming vibe that made our families and friends feel right at home.

And then, there was Renate Frey—our venue coordinator and truly our lifeline throughout the entire planning process. Renate was our go-to for every question, big or small. She connected us with trusted local vendors, helped us navigate the logistics of planning from another country, and always made us feel supported and understood. We genuinely can’t imagine our wedding without her kindness, expertise, and steady guidance.

With the venue and Renate on our team, it was time to assemble the rest of our dream vendor crew. Planning from afar meant we had to get creative—and trust our instincts:

• Research, Research, Research: We spent countless evenings scrolling through portfolios, reading reviews (sometimes in German!), and joining local wedding forums. We wanted vendors who not only had talent, but who also understood us and our story.

• Communication: Video calls and detailed emails became our lifeline. We learned quickly that clear, open communication was everything—especially across time zones and languages. Google Translate was a hero, but so was a little patience and humor.

• Recommendations: Renate was a goldmine for local connections. She introduced us to florists, photographers, and caterers who specialized in weddings for international couples, and who were excited to help us create something unique.

• Being Open-Minded: We chose to trust Hoher Darsberg’s preferred vendor lists and leaned into recommendations from Renate and our venue team. We trusted our instincts, stayed flexible, and kept an open mind about how everything would come together. Even when things didn’t go exactly as planned, being open to new ideas and solutions led to some of our favorite moments and details.

  
  

We also leaned into our own strengths: Jenna’s background in design and creative direction meant she could curate every detail with intention, while Amalia’s logistics brain kept everything running smoothly. Together, we balanced the emotional and practical sides of planning—something we now bring to every Butterfly Effect wedding.

Vendor shoutout: We worked with an amazing team of local creatives, many of whom we still keep in touch with today. They truly made us feel welcome, celebrated, and supported.

Personal Touches & Meaningful Details

One of the things we cherished most about planning our wedding was weaving in personal touches that made the day feel uniquely ours. Every detail was intentional, reflecting our story, our families, and the journey that brought us together.

• Custom Vows: We decided on custom, written-from-the-heart vows to be read in front of our 80 most loved and cherished guests who traveled far and wide for us. Standing there, we were vulnerable, raw, emotional, teary-eyed, and so, so, so happy and in love. Sharing our vows in front of everyone during the ceremony isn’t for everyone, but for us, it was everything. We worked on our vows in the days leading up to the wedding—spending pre-wedding time traveling together, soaking in the moments, and letting the words come naturally. It was peaceful, romantic, and truly one of the highlights of our journey.

• Design Details: Both of us agreed from the start that the venue and the nature surrounding Hoher Darsberg were the true main act—so stunning that too many florals or bold decorations would actually take away from the natural beauty. We kept our design neutral, calm, and serene, choosing a palette of greens, whites, and gold accents to perfectly complement the historical elements of Hoher Darsberg. Every detail was chosen to enhance, not overwhelm, letting the venue’s charm and the lush scenery shine through.

• Welcome Bags: Knowing many guests were traveling internationally, we created welcome bags filled with local treats, handwritten notes, and a little itinerary to help them explore Heidelberg. We wanted everyone to feel the love from the moment they arrived.

• Family Traditions: We honored both of our heritages by incorporating family traditions into the ceremony and reception, making our celebration feel even more special and connected.

  
  

All these small, intentional choices created a day that felt not only beautiful, but also deeply personal and full of heart.

The Big Day: Magic in the Air

When the wedding day finally arrived, it felt like everything we’d dreamed, planned, and poured our hearts into came together in the most magical way. There’s something surreal about waking up in a place that feels both new and deeply familiar, surrounded by the people who mean the most to you.

The celebration truly started the night before, when we hosted a welcome party for all our guests. It was the perfect way to kick off the festivities—giving everyone a chance to connect, explore the venue, and soak in the Heidelberg charm together. It set the tone for the weekend: warm, joyful, and full of anticipation.

On the day itself, we experienced every type of weather possible—rain, hail, snow, sunshine, mist, and everything in between. Some couples might have found it stressful, but honestly, we were just in awe. On top of the mountains, deep in the forest, surrounded by beautiful nature and with the weather simply doing its thing, it felt truly magical. We were content, because the weather didn’t matter—we were finally getting married.

Our ceremony was set against the serene beauty of Hoher Darsberg, with the lush greenery and historic architecture as our backdrop. Standing together, reading our vows in front of everyone, we felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude and joy. There were happy tears, hugs, and so much love in the air.

As the evening unfolded, we watched our family and friends explore the venue, share stories, and create their own adventures in Heidelberg. The laughter, the clinking of glasses, the music drifting through the night—it all felt like a dream come true.

What made it all work? Teamwork, flexibility, and the reminder that the “perfect” wedding is the one that feels right for you. At the end of the day, it was about love, connection, and the magic that happens when you’re surrounded by your people in a place that means everything to you.

What We Learned (and Our Advice for You!)

Looking back, planning our destination wedding in Heidelberg taught us so much about ourselves, each other, and what truly matters on a wedding day. Here are a few lessons and pieces of advice we’d love to share with anyone dreaming of a celebration abroad (or just a wedding that feels deeply personal):

• Communication is Everything: Don’t be afraid to over-communicate—with your vendors, your guests, and each other. Clear, honest conversations made all the difference for us, especially across time zones and languages.

• Be Flexible and Embrace the Unexpected: From wild weather to last-minute changes, things will happen that you can’t control. Let go of perfection and lean into the adventure—sometimes the unexpected moments become your favorite memories.

• Trust Your Instincts: Whether it’s choosing a venue, picking a vendor, or making a design decision, trust your gut. If something feels right (or not right), honor that feeling.

• Stay Organized: Tools like Trello and Google Drive were lifesavers for us, helping keep every detail in check and reducing stress along the way.

• Focus on What Matters Most: At the end of the day, it’s about your love, your story, and the people who are there to celebrate with you. The little things will fall into place.

Love, Inclusion, and Why It Matters

As two brides, we knew that planning a wedding—especially abroad—meant navigating not just logistics, but also the landscape of love and acceptance in the world. Inclusion was always our number one priority. We were incredibly grateful to have a positive, affirming planning experience in Heidelberg, surrounded by a community and vendors who celebrated us for exactly who we are.

But we also know, firsthand and through the stories of other couples, that not everyone has this experience. That’s exactly why we make inclusion and acceptance the foundation of everything we do at The Butterfly Effect Weddings. No matter who you are or who you love, you deserve your day to be loved, to be seen, and to be celebrated—fully and joyfully. We believe every love story is worthy of a beautiful beginning, and we’re here to make sure you feel safe, valued, and embraced throughout your journey.

A Full-Circle Moment: The Passport Invitations

There was one more moment during our wedding that truly took our breath away. During dinner, Jenna’s parents gave a thoughtful, heartfelt speech that brought everyone to tears (ourselves included). It was in that moment we discovered something incredible: the wedding invitation design that we had created together—our “wedding passport”—was almost an exact recreation of Jenna’s grandparents’ wedding invitations. And we had no idea.

Jenna’s grandma had lovingly handmade her own passport-themed invitations decades ago, using whatever resources she could find at the time. Amalia and I, with all the tools of today, unknowingly echoed her design and spirit in our own invites. When Jenna’s parents revealed this connection at our wedding dinner, we were stunned. It felt like another sign that everything is intertwined—reminding us to trust the process, trust our gut feelings, and follow our path forward. Sometimes, the answers and inspiration are already within us, just waiting to be discovered.

How Our Wedding Inspired The Butterfly Effect (and So Much More)

Our destination wedding in Heidelberg is just one of many reasons behind the name “The Butterfly Effect Weddings.” That experience showed us firsthand how small, intentional choices—like a handwritten note, a design detail, or even trusting your gut—can create powerful ripple effects, transforming not only a single day, but the memories and connections that last a lifetime.

But our story doesn’t stop there. Every couple we meet, every celebration we help bring to life, and every unique love story we witness continues to inspire us. The Butterfly Effect is about honoring the magic in all the little moments, believing that each one has the power to spark joy, healing, and connection for years to come.

Whether you’re planning a wedding close to home or halfway across the world, we’re here to guide you, cheer you on, and help you create a celebration that’s true to you. We believe in the beauty of intentional choices, in the importance of inclusion, and in the extraordinary impact of love in all its forms.

If you’re dreaming of a wedding that’s meaningful, joyful, and uniquely yours, we’d be honored to help you create your own butterfly effect. Reach out anytime—let’s start planning your next Butterfly Effect Wedding.